Cambodia Welcome - Raffles Grande

As many of you know, we have a thing for Cambodia. I am pretty sure it's the smiling, friendly people. When we planned the honeymoon, we couldn't resist returning to this magical country to see it's two greatest treasures - its people and its temples.

When we planned the honeymoon I think we were ambitious. In our defense, we didn't know we would be living in Singapore when we planned it. This made our Southeast Asia plans very convenient for our "return flight," but it meant that maybe we didn't have to pack in 5 locations in 15 days. We learned our lesson in Japan (kinda) when we decided to nix Kyoto and dig in in Tokyo for a variety of reasons. Well, this time we were supposed to stay just two nights in Cambodia then travel northward to it's poorer neighbor, Lao. We had been to Lao once before, but just to Vientiane, the dusty sleepy capital. This time we were bound for Luang Prabang for waterfall-gazing, temple-viewing, cultural immersion.

Well, the night we landed in Cambodia, our final honeymoon stop, the thought of Lao was exhausting. We promptly cancelled our hotel and flights, extended our stay at the Raffles, and booked a return from Siem Reap. This decision coincided with uncovering Siem Reap's actually bustling gay nightlife and finding a bar we really liked with drag shows every night. More on that later, obviously. Barcode is a new gay bar we discovered and was the site of the Lao no-go decision. I think it was somewhere around this spot:


You can't see it in this picture but there is a small stage to the left where the nightly drag show occurs. This drag show was pretty weak technically, but scored high marks in the entertainment category. The place was not too busy but we liked it - it was trying in earnest.

Seeing as it was our honeymoon, we decided at just about every turn to dial up the luxury. The initial Siem Reap thinking was to do a rustic, rural homestay. That fell apart a few weeks before because we decided to just go for the full on pampering and booked at the Raffles. Upon arrival we dropped the "honeymoon line" (this line makes me very uncomfortable, but you only get to use it once so I eventually got into it). Now, up until this point, the honeymoon line had gotten us a whole lotta "cannots" instead of any perks. Sure, we got the obligatory congratulations and a few extra decorations on desserts that we had ordered anyway, but it literally didn't get us anything free or any extra perks. Until now.

Determined, I approached the check in concierge about our nuptials and borderline demanded something. I mean, this was the RAFFLES. I'm SURE they get this kind of thing all the time and have a policy on it. Well, whether it was policy or not, it worked and we got a heavily (and I mean heavily) discounted rate on their most luxurious suite! The place had two rooms, two bathrooms, a canopy bed, two porches, and direct pool access. Observe:



I know what you're thinking - WHERE ARE THE TOWEL SWANS?! The porter apologized profusely for the error and insisted it wasn't an oversight, they just didn't have time since we switched rooms last minute. We forgave him.

My favorite part of this room is the elephant statue: 

The bathrooms were lovely. 

They DID have time to retrieve the champagne - YAY! 

As we were settling in, one of the porters knocked on the door asking if we would like some Chiclets. We didn't quite believe he actually meant to bring us little gums, but after several attempts at clarifying, we were certain that's what we would get. Then these arrived. Their accent is so cute.

The Raffles is old-world luxury, and the prices remind you of that. It was our honeymoon so we bit the bullet, but under no normal circumstances would we have indulged so much. The luxury here is really in the service. The staff is tremendous and attentive and smiley. We had coffee every morning a la butler service.

Sometimes we would enjoy the coffee on our balcony(ies). 

The grounds are very lush and the pool is downright amazing and the largest pool I have ever seen.

Some of the grounds. 

And me by the pool. 

And food by the pool. The food was GOOD even though it was western. We must have ordered the ($26) burger three times.



Calling the Raffles home for 5 nights was a perfect ending to our honeymoon. We did several major activities (helicopter ride!! - more on that later) in Siem Reap, but it was made all the more special by the time we spent doing absolutely nothing poolside at the Raffles Grande. Hotels rarely get their own blog post. Then again, they rarely convince you to cancel other parts of your vacation. The Raffles Grande was that good!

Liparadise

Koh Lipe is a tiny, tiny island located at the southern end of Thailand. Thailand is huge, and this is about as far a corner as you can find. Observe:

I don't know if Koh Lipe is the smallest Thai beach island, but it certainly feels that way. The place is just a fraction of some of the more popular large islands like Phuket and Koh Samui. I think it is a mere 3 miles across or so, and even less in width. 

Koh Lipe

There is one main "walking street" which you can see on the map is lined with restaurants and shops. There is even a 7-11 which is new to the island and brings "modernity" a la Lipe's first ATM. The place is also open 24/7 and, of course, sports industrial aircon that I'm sure draws half the island's power. 

7-11. 

Walking street

Out little slice of this island is potentially the bougeiest place available. Sawan Resort is identified on the Lipe map above with the blue arrow on the left. It's "far" from the walking street (10 minute walk?) and away from the hustle and bustle. It's adjacent to sunset beach, a place only popular from approximately 5pm-7pm, before and after which it is pretty much deserted. But for those two hours, you get some of the most spectacular sunsets you can imagine. Of course, this is the period when the folks on this side of the island can cash in, so the bars on this beach are pretty crowded for those 120 minutes. There is even a pop up bar run by a Spaniard who just throws towels down on the beach and sells mojitos for 100 baht from a makeshift bar on a folding table. It's all very Thai. 

Sunset beach panorama:

OK so I will cut to the chase with the key gems that Koh Lipe has to offer: 

Sunsets

From aptly named sunset beach we witnessed some breathtaking visuals. We had the luxury of being directly next to this beach and took advantage every evening. I'll let the pictures speak for themselves.

This isn't Jordan and I in a romantic moment but let's pretend it is. 

Food

Lipe's offerings don't top at sunsets. They actually have good food, too. But we shouldn't give it too much credit because this is Thailand, after all. All the food is good. 

There were a couple things that made this island stand out food-wise, though. First is Burmese food. The island is practically run by Burmese immigrants, both legal and illegal, but no one is really here to police anything so who knows. The "restaurant" that comes to mind is called Forever Restaurant (we are trip advisor slaves and we admittedly found it thanks to its favorable ranking). The quotes are necessary because this clearly wasn't a proper restaurant - it was more like a house with covered picnic tables on its front porch to serve the 2 diners at a time that come by. We ate there at least twice and both times were the only ones at the place. The other reason this isn't a restaurant is because it is run by a woman and her husband and is literally a house. When we would roll up on the place we would disturb them from whatever newscast or soccer match they were watching, while the wife would go prepare everything from scratch and the husband would wait on us farang (white people). The food tasted as special as they made it felt - the curries were delicious, the vegetables were unlike anything we had ever tasted, and the overall experience was delicious. 

Mustard greens, pork curry, another vegetable with fermented fish paste (not my favorite, actually), and others. 

Then there was the more straight-forward seafood the island is better known for. The walking street is lined with restaurants that show you your food before you eat it, in true Asia-style. 

Hmm....

I'll take that one, please! 

And this is what it looks like post-prep. 

And then there's the traditional Thai stuff like larb moo and papaya salad.

It makes me go oOoOoOh!

Perhaps our most memorable food experience on the island was the food that the Sawan staff made for us. They saw us walking past one day and asked us if we like "spicy." To us, this sounded like a challenge. They had thrown down the spicy gauntlet. We obviously couldn't back down and invited all they had. 

This was a poor life decision. The seafood noodle salad they were casually eating was the hottest thing that has ever touched our mouths. You can't see flames coming from the dish, but believe me, they're there. 

The next day we passed the staff and they all started laughing and asked us "how is your stomach today?!?"

Beaches

Obviously the main draw here is the beach. Thailand is the best place for a beach getaway in the world if you ask me. Lipe's beaches don't disappoint! Jordan's shirt says it all. 

From the water

Beach selfies

Longtail Boat Rides!

We took a whole day and went to the "outer islands" for exploration and snorkeling. Our boat generally avoided crowds and showed us some decent snorkeling areas, but none really blew us away. The boat ride is always a pleasing thing for me though. 

It was a choppy day, you can see from the whitecaps. 

The scenery was worth the near-seasickness 

A blurry but effective video at showing the exciting journey. 

Still image of islands seen in the video:

Happy as a clam. Or a sea urchin. 

I spent much of the boat ride trying to find monkeys in the trees. 

I had no idea what I was in for when we stopped for lunch. They were literally everywhere, and were way more interested in our food than us. I somehow didn't get many pictures, but here are some where's waldos:

Most of my time with the monkeys was spent being pissed that the Chinese tourists felt the need to feed the monkeys human food. The environmentalist guilt in me raged. 

Unfortunately, I can't find my underwater fish pictures so those will have to be added later. 

Actual Culture

Thai islands aren't known for their overwhelming cultural experiences, and Lipe isn't too different, but it does have some bright spots. I referred to the Burmese people that run the island. They have their little villages here and had at least two major parties/festivals while we were on the island. One of them, which might actually be a Thai festival with Thai rituals, involved sending burning candles out to sea. I believe this was honoring their ancestors. 

Here are some of the lanterns at sea. They are hard to see. 

Here they are preparing the floating lanterns. 

Our hotel actually provided us with one of these floaters. It was quite pretty! It came equipped with incense and all. 

Here's a blurry shot of Jordan putting his out to sea. 

Part of the festival was a parade with some sort of float. The key part to this was that the float was carried by a bunch of drunk 12 year olds. I'm kinda not joking. 

One thing I like about Thailand is their commitment to their culture. It is very strong in Bangkok and elsewhere we have been on the mainland, but it was also very refreshing to see it here on this distant island as well. 

Lipe was great and just what we needed after the mad rush of Tokyo where our FOMO severely hampered our ability to relax. We were sad to leave, obviously. It really hit the spot!

Epilogue

I wasn't sure if I would tarnish this post with spidey's appearance, but I would be remiss if I didn't share this terrifying experience with you. It comes with the territory of paradise-islands. Especially when your hotel room has outdoor bathrooms. 

This little critter, or as I like to call him, the largest f@#%$ing spider I have ever seen, was waiting for us one evening when we returned from the bars and massages of the walking street. It was about 1 AM and I would like to apologize here to the poor souls I awoke that evening with my wails. 

Without further adieu, I introduce would like to introduce spidey:

 

Imagine if I hadn't looked before I sat??? He (or she) could have eaten me entirely! Like, in one gulp.The spidey incident happened on the first or second night we were in Lipe. You can imagine my hesitation to sit for the rest of the week. This made for an interesting bathroom schedule. 

Tokyo -> Lipe and Everywhere in Between

Any good honeymoon has a period of relaxation built in. Actually, normal honeymoons are almost exclusively relaxation-based. We are obviously psychopaths and need to keep ourselves extremely busy the whole time, exploring, eating, seeing, and experiencing. Well, our time in Koh Lipe fit the bill of being both relaxing and adventurous/exciting.

In our search for island relaxation while planning our honeymoon, we searched for a less-touristy place than the islands we had been to previously. We wanted small, quaint, local feeling (that's a stretch in Thailand), different, comfortable, and of course beautiful - but that was a given for any island in the region. After much searching we landed on Koh Lipe - an extremely tiny island on the west side of Thailand that has no history of local life but has been revived exclusively for beachgoers and immigrants willing to serve them. Doesn't sound that authentic, and it kinda wasn't, but it had its own original charm. The locals and foreigners alike stay on the island to help run its many beachfront resorts. These beaches were obviously beautiful but also had properties that went right up to the water, creating incredibly picturesque settings.

This all sounds well and good, but Lipe is NOT easily accessible - hence the adventure. We did not make this easy on ourselves. The trek took an entire day, literally. Primarily because we were coming from Tokyo, but no matter which way you slice it this place is out of the way. The journey began in Tokyo with:

A TRAIN

Two and a half hour train ride from Tokyo to Osaka. It's a long story as to why we didn't actually stay in Osaka/Kyoto at all, which was the original plan. Let's just say it comes down to ryokans being booked and Chinese people. I still got my Shinkansen train ride, though. 

Happy as a clam.

TO ANOTHER TRAIN

In Osaka we had to switch to a regional train bound for Kansai airport (KIX).

We bought "green car class" tickets, which is basically their first class. It was apparently unnecessary on our train from Osaka to KIX. Plenty of leg room. And all other kind of room you can imagine.


We tried taking wide angle selfies, but it wasn't working for some reason.

Jordan got fed up.

Osaka has an impressive metro rail in its own right. I had just long enough in the station to snap a picture.

TO AN AIRPLANE

My favorite bird in the sky - the 747. This on is OLD and you rarely find airlines flying them like this anymore. The galley in business class was actually entirely to the right side (starboard?) of the plane. As in, the left side had seats, and there was a wall separating it from the galley (kitchen) on the right. No windows on the right hand side. Have you ever? None of this mattered, though, because we were in coach for this redeye. Ugh.

It's still the most beautiful thing in the air. 

TO ANOTHER AIRPLANE

The next leg was BKK to HDY (Hat Yai), which I didn't know existed until we planned this trip. It's a remote city in the far south of Thailand that is often used as a transit point for islands, but mostly for locals who live in the area. This flight was obviously short - about 1 hour.

I have to caveat this by saying we went into Bangkok for two hours on our 6 hour layover. Those of you who have been know that it is a long journey from BKK to the city, but we are, of course, nuts. We went to eat at our favorite street, took a motorcycle taxi, a boat ride, and another train back to the airport. A productive day. The only regret I have is the death of my new and adored Samsung phone, which brought you many of the pictures in this blogging run to-date. The silver lining for you is that from this point on I almost exclusively used my Canon DSLR. Prettier pictures! Here's one of them now. Useless to most, but my favorite subject matter. 

BKK is still one of my favorite airports. 

Look how pretty it is! 

I <3 Thailand

Hat Yai is apparently an "international airport." I think there's a flight from Singapore every day or something, but that's about it. BUT, if you have the label, you need the facilities, such as a separate baggage carousel for inbound international luggage. Our flight from BKK was technically international for us because our bags were transiting from Osaka Kansai. We were apparently the only ones - look at our lonely bags on the international belt!

So at Hat Yai we realized our travels were really just beginning...

TO A CAR 

The transit from Hat Yai to the Pak Bara ferry terminal looks unsuspecting on the map. As my mom and dad would say on our cross-country US road trip when I was 12 - "look, it's just one thumb and one pinky away on the map!" (this was obviously before goole maps and directions, so we relied on my all-time favorite printed books - atlases). So yes, Hat Yai is "close" to Pak Bara on the map, but it's just not. Our transfer took about 2 hours, but only thanks to the maniacal speed demon behind the wheel. I wasn't sure we would make it. 

To borrow from Russian Google:

To make matters more dangerous, the taxi drove ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE ROAD THE WHOLE TIME. 

TO A BOAT

Koh Lipe is an island, so naturally a boat would be involved in this transit. At Pak Bara we waited an hour or so for the "speedboat" to Koh Lipe. A hodgepodge operation if I ever saw one, but it got us there. Pak Bara is a one-horse town that only exists thanks to the local pier, which we had to pay a fee of 50 baht each to use. The pier was lined with vendors trying to sell what can only be described as these odd selfie-plates. It's basically a picture of you or your face on a board with a map of Koh Lipe in the background and Thai writing all around. Must be a Thai thing. They didn't even try to sell these things to us. 

These are the boards. There are thousands of them already made. It makes me wonder who they were for, because these things are not prepared instantly on the spot. My guess is they take your picture when you pass through, then have it ready for when you come back from the island. Who knows. 

The staff at the ferry terminal dealt with our bags, thank god. That's the speedboat on the right hand side. And those are our bags going down the stairs. 

After a few hours we were finally speedboat-boarded and Lipe-bound! The boat was empty, which I'm told is a rarity during high season. 

The boat was FAST. Check out the three turbo-Hondas and their wake. We bumped and tossed the whole way there - not an easy trip for the weak of stomach, unless you're one of the Thai that frequent the island and drink beer the whole way. 

Thanks to those Thai people, we got some good pictures of ourselves!

The scenery on this boat was something special. Beached boat at Pak Bara port:

Distant islands and perfect water. 

Large islands that remind me of Lantau. But what doesn't remind me of Hong Kong??

After about an hour and a half I was done with the scenery. I was ready to get off. The outline of Lipe could not have come at a better time!

So here is the car/boat journey in a nutshell... with one omission...

TO YET ANOTHER BOAT

So Koh Lipe doesn't have a pier. It doesn't have anything, really. You have to board a long-tail boat to get from the speedboat to land, with a little knee-deep wading in the middle. It only cost an extran 50 baht! (each)

After some sardine-ing, we were all aboard, bags included. 

The boat ride was short. You can see the distance here. 

Jordan and our luggage posing while I precariously took a picture with my extremely expensive camera.

Thanks, longtail! The driver took our luggage off and plopped it in the sand on the beach. Thanks driver! 

TO A..."TAXI?"

The longtail transfer was actually kinda fun because we were prepared for it, but I don't think the others were. What we weren't prepared for was being dropped off at a completely different side of the island than we were scheduled to be at. Apparently "high winds" kept us from Pattaya beach and forced us onto Sunrise beach. We had to call our hotel and figure it out. They quickly dispatched their "taxi." The taxi is a dirt bike with a sidecar. It was cute and got the job done. 

 

We made friends with our driver, who we used probably 50 more times throughout the week. He was so adorable! So was the little sign with my name on it - they even spelled it right! 

So let's recap, with departure times:

Tokyo (5PM) - Osaka (7PM) - Kansai (11:30PM) - Bangkok (11AM +1day) - Hat Yai (1PM) - Pak Bara (3:30PM) - Middle of the Bay (5:30PM) - Hotel Arrival (6PM)

That's a whole day of travel. But it was worth it. This is what we arrived to:

Welcome drink

A gorgeous room:

Honeymoon Swans!

With gorgeous views. No, jaw-dropping, epic, honeymoon-worthy views. 

Panoramic from the room:



Other room views:

Balcony views - that's sunset beach in the distance. 

Crystal clear shallow snorkeling waters at our feet. 

And finally, epic sunsets. I will do another post about the island and the various scenes, but here is one to whet your whistle. 

Thailand is awesome. Koh Lipe is no exception. Well worth the day it took to get here. Let the relaxation begin!